FAMILY IN ISLAM book

Dr. Fatma BAYRAKTAR KARAHAN


abstract

It is possible for people living in society to overcome their loneliness in this world and to meet their physical and emotional needs by establishing a family. The person, who has been in the family environment from the moment he was born, feels the need to establish a new family after growing to maturity. This is not only an innate feature of him, but also the expectation of society from him. Because this new family to be established will ensure the continuity of the generation and society.

Women and Men: Two Different Genders of the Same Essence

The Qur'an, which is the most basic source of orders, prohibitions and recommendations that a person will need throughout his life, accepts women and men as human beings first. The Qur'an uses the expression "an-nas" (humankind) for both men and women. Because it accepts men and women as addressees together. It invites all of humanity to believe in Allah (swt), without any discrimination, brings proofs, and wants people to reach the truth by using their minds. Thus, people who believe in the truths revealed by Allah (swt) and lead their lives in this direction will achieve true happiness in this world and in the Hereafter. As mentioned in Qur'an; "The believing men and believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and establish prayer and give zakah and obey Allah and His Messenger. Those - Allah will have mercy upon them. Indeed, Allah is Exalted in Might and Wise." (Tawbah, 9/71)
Both men and women are servants of Allah (swt). It is possible to be a servant that Allah is pleased with, by following His orders and by doing amal salih. Men and women who obey the verses, orders and prohibitions of the Qur'an will be rewarded for what they do. There is no difference between being a woman or a man in the reward and punishment that Allah will give. Our Lord has revealed this situation as follows:
"Never will I allow to be lost the work of [any] worker among you, whether male or female; you are of one another. So those who emigrated or were evicted from their homes or were harmed in My cause or fought or were killed - I will surely remove from them their misdeeds, and I will surely admit them to gardens beneath which rivers flow as reward from Allah, and Allah has with Him the best reward." (Al-i ‘Imran, 3/195) 
"Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer - We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do." (Nahl, 16/97)
There is no difference between men and women in terms of being a servant of Allah and the value of deeds. On the contrary, the real measure of value in the sight of Allah is to fear Allah properly after believing. This situation is expressed as follows in the 13th verse of Surah Hujurat: “O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you.” The hikmah behind the different creation of men and women is explained in this verse. The two genders have their own physical and psychological differences, and these differences will allow them to meet and socialize. It is necessary not to be disturbed by these differences and not to pursue uniformity. In the 32nd verse of Surah Nisa, men and women are addressed as follows: "And do not wish for that by which Allah has made some of you exceed others. For men is a share of what they have earned, and for women is a share of what they have earned.  And ask Allah of his bounty. Indeed Allah is ever, of all things, Knowing." This verse was revealed when Umm Salama said“O Allah's messenger, men go to jihad, but women do not, we receive the half from the heritage.” This shows that this situation is to be considered in balance between right and responsibility.
While gender difference does not cause any discrimination between men and women in terms of rights and freedoms, it manifests itself in some provisions that consider physical and psychological characteristics. This situation, which is natural, cannot be considered as an injustice against women. Because the consideration of gender and physical fitness factor in duties and responsibilities is for the benefit of both genders. Gender-related characteristics of creation should be taken into account in order to realize the possessed abilities well. 
In some beliefs and ways of thinking in history, women were vilified because of some of their characteristics such as haydh, physical weakness, childbirth, and these features were perceived as a deficiency and even as a punishment given to them from birth. Such approaches do not coincide with the Islamic understanding of women. In addition, the claims that Hawa (Eve) was cursed by Allah and punished by birth for provoking Adam to expel him from Paradise are completely against the Qur'an in terms of both the justice of Allah and the understanding of man as a responsible being on earth. In the Qur'an, men and women were created from the same essence, Adam and Hawa sinned together, then repented together and were forgiven: 
And We said, "O Adam,  dwell, you and your wife, in Paradise  and eat therefrom in [ease and] abundance from wherever you will. But do not approach this tree, lest you be among the wrongdoers." But Satan caused them to slip out of it and removed them from that [condition] in which they had been.” (Baqarah, 2/35-36) 
Haidh (menstruation) is not the punishment imposed on one side for this common sin. Birth and motherhood, which elevate women to a special status, should be seen as a blessing from Allah (swt), rather than a punishment for her. The most important sign that this situation is not a punishment is that the woman is not responsible for some religious orders while she is menstruating and that she is provided with facilities. On the other hand, veiling, which has an important role in establishing women's freedom, is a proof that Islam wants women to exist in society. Because wearing a hijab is a rule that a woman will obey and apply in the outside world and society, not among her mahram. Hijab enables women to manifest themselves with their personality and character. In addition, the hijab order is also valid for men in accordance with the male physique. (Nur, 24/30) 

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